finally.. i realise how my behaviour was for the past 3 yrs..
the agony.. the lost in trust.. the heart breaking feeling.. now.. i do understand how the both of u feel.. i am so sorry.. i am not a good daughter nor a good sister..
i am a bad example.. bad examples are always being pick up easily.. tts why.. my brother had evolved into another me..
rebellious, bad tempered, failing to admit ur wrong, telling untruths, quarreling with parents, ignoring comments by family members.. throwing tempers.. and many more..
looking at my brother's behaviour.. i saw myself in him.. the kind of feeling is juz so familar.. after experiencing it myself.. i feel so terrible.. i feel so heart broken.. i think.. this is juz wat my parents feel when i was like tt 3 yrs ago..
thinking back.. i felt so foolish.. why did i do such stupid things? why did i hurt my parents so badly? no wonder the lost trust could not be found back any more.. no wonder the there is always a barrier between me and my parents.. no wonder they dun believe in me anymore.. no wonder they ignored me some time 2 yrs ago..
i am juz too bad..
and now.. my brother is repeating juz the same as wat i did.. argh.. how i wish i can slap him.. make him wake up.. i juz wish he can stop wasting his time.. stop playing tt stupid maple.. stop talking on the phone till midnight.. stop day dreaming.. and pay more attention to his studies..
i regret.. i regret for not using my time wisely.. i regret i did not make full use of all the opportunities given to me.. i juz let it slip past me.. hahas.. i think i juz deserve it..
